I hear of so many people struggling to find balance. A wonderful coach called Nova Woodrow said to me “you don’t find balance, you need to create and define it”. This really resonated with me and reminded me of an exercise demonstrated to me by one of my tutors. He put a pen down on the table and said pick it up. I picked it up. Then he put it back down and said “try and pick it up”. I picked it up and he said: “no, I said try.”
When we ‘try’ and do something we don’t actually do it, because if we achieved it – it wouldn’t be trying, it would be achieving. So as we settle into May, starting with a bank holiday it’s a perfect time to think about what balance means to you. One of the main reasons people come and see me is because they feel their life is out of balance. Whether it’s working too much or too little; caring for others and forgetting about yourself or feeling out of control it (and many more examples) often come down to balance.
In any given moment our life is in balance and if any part of it requires a larger piece of our focus/energy then we need to take focus/energy away from another part of our life. When we feel unbalanced we have to find perspective and realign our focus/energy to restore the balance once more.
The first step is to assess your current situation. Check-in with yourself:
- How do you feel? Are you exhausted mentally/physically?
- How are your relationships? (work or personal)
- How is your time spent across the different areas of your life?
- Do you spend more time internally/externally focused?
You can use the wheel of anything for this.
Once you have defined the areas where you need/want to realign your focus/energy then you can create the goals you want to help you achieve balance. Set realistic goals, remembering the end goal is to feel more balanced.
The willingness to assess yourself and make changes will in itself make you feel more relaxed and give you a more general awareness of your life. Remember that life is in flow, it changes and your goals and decisions can be fluid too; you can always change your mind if something isn’t working.
You will know when you feel more balanced; you will likely feel calm, more grounded, motivate and clear on what you want.